Building Healthy Marriages
About fifty percent of marriages end in divorce. Obviously, many marriages are not healthy. Having a healthy marriage is not a "normal" phenomenon. However, it is something to strive for.
All marriages have difficulties, and all couples fight. What seems to distinguish a marriage that lasts from one that doesn't is how couples fight. Partners that are drawn closer together after an argument seem to make their marriages work while partners that are pushed farther away from each other after arguments end up with broken marriages. This highlights that how we communicate with our spouses has a direct affect on the outcome of our marriages. Commitment to the relationship is also equally important in maintaining a healthy relationship.
Marriage Builders
- Healthy communication
- Each partner being responsible for themselves
- Accepting each other "as is"
- Do not be abusive or allow abusive behaviors
- Supporting each other in each person getting their needs met
- Give the marriage your full attention
- Share responsibilities
- Treat each other with respect (not controlling your spouse)
- Accept your differences
- Learn to compromise
- Have quality time daily with each other
- Know some common threats to marriage, and be prepared
- Take marriage education classes before marriage and marriage enrichment classes after being married
The greatest marriage myth
Marriage should be easy if the relationship is a good one
The fact
Great marriages take an enormous amount of hard work
Common Threats to Marriage
- Lack of communication
- Lack of commitment
- Selfishness
- Being disrespectful
- Abusive or controlling behavior
- In-law relationships
- Finances
- Lack of role models for a healthy marriage
- Role identification problems
- Having someone chronically or terminally sick in the family
- Having a previous marriage
